Shane and I are leaving for Texas after work tomorrow. A pleasant surprise, a friend of ours (and her baby) are coming along for the trip and we will drop her off with her family while we are spending time near Teen Mania and with friends. We will also be driving through the night when we come home sunday night/monday, so please pray for us.
I haven't had much to say these days, I still think about some of you I used to share with here on Revelife and I feel a little bad about it. In many ways it is freeing not to have the internet at home and I am using my time a little more wisely...but I miss being able to so easily keep in touch with people.
My time has been consumed with my job, house work, cooking, reading and learning, and spending time with friends. Shane and I are part of a small group once a week. I am going to try to learn how to knit soon. If I have some time before I leave for Texas I am going to bake a green tomato pie. Shane has his hunting license and yesterday we ate the first squirrel he killed. I am 24 now. We are doing a lot of thinking and praying, not sure what the Lord has in store for us. I feel a little out of place sometimes, not sure where I fit, like a fish trying to swim in the desert. Maybe I just shouldn't get offended when little old ladies who know everything don't want to listen to what I have to say because they took a course once in 1973. I guess I just want to feel like I have something valid to say, to feel a little bit important.
But I also have been recognizing a lot of lies in my life that I have been buying into and I want to change. I realized for so long I have just tried to ignore them and push them away, but if I was bleeding from the head I would do something about it, right? So I need to be actively doing something to combat these lies. I am tired of believing that I am worthless, that I should keep my distance from people because no one wants to be around me, I am tired of believing I am ugly, fat, annoying, overwhelming, or whatever it is I am buying into. Sometimes I have no idea who I am because I have been believing I am this person for so long.
I love the Lord. He is really fantastic. I want to understand what He really meant when He said to follow Him, and not get tangled up or confused by anything else. I know what I believe, I just need to find my voice. I always want to keep learning, and I pray the Lord protect me from falling away. I want my heart to be fully His.
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Comments (3)
What a great post! Thanks for updating us. I strongly respect your willingness to move forward and not get bogged down in your personal and spiritual life.
I love knitting more than almost anything in the world. I hope you will, too.
Wish I could have some green tomatoes!
Congrats on being 24. Love you.
Praying for your trip.
Thanks for you post! We all need to keep our faith fresh and relevant and to continue to grow. This is God's plan for us.
"I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed, and I am convinced that he is able to guard until that Day what has been entrusted to me."
Have a wonderful time on your trip!